I've never felt this way before. For the first time in my life, I feel unsafe. Maybe I've lived naively the past 30 years. Or maybe I've never felt such threat before. I'm sure I am not the only one who is feeling this numb, what-do-we-do-now feeling.
But as a mother of two small children, today, I couldn't help but hold them and kiss them and whisper to them over and over again that I loved them. I have possibly lost a bit of the nonchalant bounce in my step. I will never mother the same again. I am forever changed. And I suspect I am not the only one.
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But I reminded myself of something -- and I will continue to remind myself in the days to come. This is not glib -- this is not flippant -- this is truth, whether we believe it in our gut or not, it is the truth: God is in control. And I have to believe that from my core or I won't be able to go on.
The God that I love and have given my life to -- for whatever reason -- allowed all of this. But that same God is all-knowing and all-powerful and ever-present and fully just and completely loving. And moms, He will get us through this. The bounce in our step will come back -- maybe not to the same degree, but if we lean into His care, it will come back. And our naivete may be forever gone -- but the lessons we take away from all of this -- how much bigger life is than our petty differences; how much larger a scheme of things there is compared to our tiny problems and inconveniences; that people -- the people we love -- are so much more important than our selfishness; and that, yes, we have a God who will walk us through this -- those are lessons that will fill the void our innocence has left.
Moms -- love your children, love your husbands, love your God. What else do we have, really?